The Calm Before the Storm

What did Rihanna say to the 911 dispatcher?

"S.O.S please someone help me."

The Second Walk On Water

Jesus' second walk on water was a lot less miraculous

Walking beard deep in water

He bellowed, "I...AM...JESUS!"

He amazed no one. 

The Definitive Essay On Walking

On Walking

Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot.*

* Repeat until arrival at desired location.

Barley Legal

Barely Legal magazine is completely different from Barely Girls magazine.

2009 PREDICTIONS

1.In a response to the recession, Mexicans build a bridge from Mexico to China, it is by far the most architecturally advanced structure the world has ever seen. Mass illegal immigration ensues. It shows the world that Mexican immigration was never about America,it was always a constant search to better themselves by finding the lowest possible wage in a foreign country.

2.Republicans will create a new genre of television show, so entertaining that the nation will not care that Bush is somehow president again.

3.Vh1 will create a new celebrity reality show called "Balls In Your Court". The show will feature former professional basketball, football, and soccer players, who all live under one roof, and are gay as the Sun is hot.